Almost everyone loves drugs. Whether it's a cigarette break after a high-powered business meeting, a cold beer after a hot day on the job or a half-ounce of heroin injected directly into the scrotum to ease the stress of writing Internet comedy, people love their intoxicants.
But that's not a human invention. Experts have found that animals also seek out a quick chemical high from plants, bugs and, well, wherever they can find it. Here are seven animals that love the magic of intoxication even more than we do.
Scandal! I demand that General Mills drop their degenerate anthropomorphic bee mascot immediately. And how can the GOP possibly continue to associate itself with a species of lushes like elephants? Worst of all, what will the children think when they learn that Santa Claus' universally respected reindeer love to trip balls? All these animals owe the American people apologies--they've really let us down with their inappropriate behavior.