Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Ann Coulter's New Stand Up Routine

Check out the hilarity:

Watch CBS Videos Online

Ta-Nehisi Coates offers this excellent response:
In roughly six minutes, Ann Coulter asserts that Sean Hannity is more likely to be assassinated than Barack Obama, that the country is teeming with "left-wing violence," calls W. the most persecuted and attacked president since Richard Nixon, and calls Tom Delay a victim of oppression. As I said--So. Awesome. My only beef with this interview was that dude should have let her talk more, and disagreed less. Plus no hits on Michelle Obama. Come on man! More thuggism plz!


Anonymous said...

It's true she's an idiot, but she's better than you are Chris. At least she's consistent, whereas you are wildly inconsistent.

Christopher Patton said...

Examples, please?

Nate said...

They're baaaaack!

Bust out your crazy hat, Christopher.

Anonymous said...

Oh Nate you little cutie, "we" never left. Logic and a lack of being self-centered are not your friends. You, Chris, and your gang think your "paper", actually make a difference. You don't. Nor does the fact that I and many others disagree with you most (but not all) of the time. By the time students get to college you provide a nice diversion, maybe lead a few away from their roots for a few years, but the conservative, liberal, libertarian, or whatever roots we had prior to college all return after leaving the liberal nest of college.

Chris, I don't need to provide examples to you, you're too immature to understand it. You're wildly inconsistent, the only entertaining thing is watching you flop all over yourself like a fish in the sun. You and Nate provide me and my partners with comic relief on a nearly daily basis. I love you both for your ignorance and naive view of the world. Things like gay "marriage" will happen (and i hope it does), yes there will be a smoking ban, yes there will be these "great" liberal ideas that come to be.......but it won't be because of either of you - neither of you matter more than two drops of monkey piss. And Chris, stop making an ass of yourself - I say this in sympathy, practicing lawyers laugh at you... a lot. I'm a lawyer (no, not some fancy or important one, just an everyday lawyer), and in my firm several partners started getting the daily iowan online...you are a joke to them....and their friends. You'll get a job, you'll be employed, but you won't be respected. You're degree will be just another piece of paper.

You two are here to entertain me and my ilk, and to feed red meat to those who already think like you do, well tofu burgers in that case, but you get the point. Neither of you understand what it is to be American, neither of you understand sacrifice, neither of you have worked 12 hours a day getting your hands dirty and sweating your ass off, and it's clear neither of you truly get the notion of individual rights.

Keep writing, keep entertaining, but don't lie to yourself so much as to think what you do matters. There are a select few that do matter, neither of you are one of those select few.

Do yourself a favor, take 2 steps....okay, both of you are so far in the BS, take 20 steps back, take a deep breath, and understand it's all bullshit.

Joe_Nobody said...

Wow, someone is a little pissy....anyways, serious question. I don't like Ann, she's a cunt, but why don't you guys ever rip on the New York Times or MSNBC? Yes, Fox sucks and is bias. Yes Ann sucks and is bias. But what about the other side of the coin - seriously Rachel and Keith don't exactly provide a "fair and balanced" approach? I'm all for calling the jackholes at Fox on the mats, but call ALL the shitheads on the mats. What say you to that?

taco said...

She may be right. If there's anyone I could kill in politics knowing I would get away with it, it's Sean Hannity. You can quote me on that.

Christopher Patton said...

Sticks and stones, Mr. Anonymous, sticks and stones. In any case, I'd be happy to attempt to clear up any confusions you have about my political views if you'd be willing to express your concerns in a coherent fashion.

Until then I'll just note that your low opinion of my understanding of the law (particularly regarding civil liberties) is entirely justified. I scraped by in Con Law II at the UI law school with a mere A. I would only be truly qualified to opine on such matters if I had lived up to my full potential and earned an A+.

Oh, also, I'd like to point out that web hits drive up the DI's advertising revenue. Especially in these difficult times for newspapers, that's a very important thing. So please continue to recruit people to read and mock my columns. I greatly appreciate your contribution to my paycheck.

Nate said...

Anonymous, sweetheart, have you ever heard of Hon industries? Ever worked their assembly line on the midnight shift in 90 degree weather?

You're on extremely thin ice, jackass.

Anonymous said...

Shithead, I mean Nate,

Thin ice, seriously? You're gonna make junior high threats over a blog....ohhhhhhhh i'm shaking. While you are pulling your panties out of your crack, keep readin, you might learn something.

Graveyard shift on an assembly line in any temperature ain't that bad - i've done it. Ever clear out snow in feedbunks in 30 below with windchill? Ever move cattle off a hill to make sure they don't freeze to death? I could go on an on boy - 11 brothers on sisters on a farm and you learn what work is. Go grab your little toys and play with them while you live in your dreamland of being a hard-working, intelligent, and that you actually matter. If that isn't fulfilling enough just tell ChrissyFace how smart he must be because some prof gave him some letter grade in some class and therefore that somehow proves his intelligence and expertise - clearly if one person provides validation it must be true.

I'm not on thin ice, but i am a jackass to be sure. Someday when you grow up, you might you have a clue.

For the time being I'm going to show mercy on you two kids. When I think you are prepared to learn more, I'll begin to teach you both again. I'll grade you out at a D Chris since grades seem to matter to you. Nate, I'll give you a grade of macho since you seem so tough and scary.

You kids.

Christopher Patton said...

Nate's threat is simply to disallow anonymous comments because such a high percentage of them are so childish. I used to disagree with him, but I'm quickly coming around to his position.

Regardless, your assertion that getting good grades at a top tier law school is meaningless is quite amusing, especially since you claim to be a practicing attorney. You should know that starting salaries are largely dependent on such factors. Furthermore, if doing exceptionally well in a Con Law class taught by a scholar who is highly regarded nationally doesn't indicate that I know quite a bit more than the average person about the Constitution, then what would? I'm not saying I'm currently qualified to argue in front of the US Supreme Court or anything, but I highly doubt you are either, you pusillanimous troll.